RECONNECT

RECONNECT
 
Today I am heading off to reconnect with a group who have decided to use this quiet time between Christmas and New Year to take a moment to themselves. As I prepare for the group, and my new year, I am looking at my own intentions and wishes for this fast approaching New Year.
 
Often we look at New Year as a time to renew vows to self, peel off a few pounds, be more active, kinder, efficient, fabulous. You may have more strategic goals that involve figures, targets and bottom lines.
 
Whatever we choose to act on, or renew, we must remember our-self, in all of that. Yes I am using a collective term and the SELF because we are all in this together, yet it is our singular self that we are working on. Our SELF has habits, neural pathways that have been defined over years to make the way we think, the way we move, the way we react. Those habits shape us. Without identifying how and where we are NOW, we are ignoring ourselves and all the work gone into creating this fabulous self that is here right now.
 
When making a new plan or commitment it can be triggered by dissatisfaction to where we are now. A simple example is if I am heavy after wintering well, I will want to lose weight. Some may buy the sports clothes and start running and eating less. However after some days or weeks this shock to the system is too much and old strong and well-manicured habits return. It's cold outside. We forget we had given up alcohol in a moment of stress. Or begin to stash "healthy choclate" for rewards that turn into feasts.  Then we get disappointed.  We must realise our habits are strong and will win. Especially when we don't really listen to ourselves. By that I mean listening to how the body talks to us as well as the mind.
 
Let me tell you a fairly obvious well known secret. Humans don’t like change that much. They may wish for change, but they don’t like enacting it in their lifestyle. We, me included, prefer to have a beautiful body, no pain, and a healthy lifestyle in all areas, however I am quite happy/busy with the way I do things right now.
 
So that’s why it is important to reconnect to yourself. Find out what you really want so that you have a simple goal borne from within, not layered on top of a really very busy, already, lifestyle.
 
So take a moment TODAY (whatever day it is as you read this, it does not have to be approaching January) to RECONNECT to YOU.
Let’s make a list. It’s easier to read and bring action to.
 

1. LISTEN to yourself to find what you truly would like to change.
2. Make a list as to how happy you are with the different areas of your life: relationships, health, finances, body, mind, ______ etc.
3. Find out what you would like to change in each area.
4. Take time to your whole self again. Meditate, go for a walk in nature, move to music. This is a listening and enjoying your whole self without focusing on the prize with your overactive mind.
5. LISTEN to what comes to you as the most important part of your life that you want to address.
6. Yes there are ten things that you want to change but choose ONE. Just one thing that you can bring your attention and energy to in a simple doable, maintainable way. You can repeat the process in the future when you have become happy with the small changes you actually do make. ONE thing.
7. Now that you have identified what you want to change, make yourself a goal that is ACHEIVABLE for YOU. You will know what is too big and brings a performance anxiety, and what is too small that is not even a challenge. Yes YOU will know yourself but again you will have to LISTEN to what your whole body is saying to you.
8. Write down the ONE thing. Write it and stick it to your mirror, create an alert on your phone, leave notes on the floor that you trip over to remind you to interrupt your normal routine every day by recommitting to this ONE thing.

 
Example
ONE thing to work on could be take yourself outside and walk for 1km each day for three weeks or two months or a year. That can take you towards goals of relaxing, finding ME time, or starting a routine to greater exercise. The deal is OUTSIDE, and 1km can take just 15 minutes. You might find yourself enjoying this ritual and then you have made an enjoyable change which the human (YOU) may like and feel rewarded as the commitment is met.
 
Now does that seem real and doable? Does that line up with what YOU and YOUR body/life/mind/soul wants? Not a script of “10 shoulds/must haves” from a magazine.  It has to be about YOU so that YOU, the WHOLE of YOU is behind the WISH you have.
 
All we are doing here is interrupting the habits of a lifetime.
No big deal. ;)
 
Enjoy your reconnection.
 
Love
Fiona x